Inducing Labor Naturally

So, everyone and their mother has a suggestion as to how to induce labor. Here are some I’ve heard recently:

1. Eating spicy food. Actually, this whole pregnancy, I’ve really craved spicy food, so this has been no problem for me. Lately, the food’s been so spicy, it numbs my lips. Alas, no baby.

2. Eating pineapple. Also tried this one. Yummy. Resulted in heartburn (damned citrus acid). No baby.

3. Sex. Umm- no one needs to know about my sex life. No baby.

4. Walking. Every day. Several miles per day. No baby.

5. Massage pressure point near ankle. Tried this a couple times. Have no clue if I’m doing it correctly. Caused loads of Braxton Hicks. No baby.

6. Castor oil. Not trying this because of the following unpleasant side effects: (a) explosive diarrhea (gross); (b) vomiting; (c) can cause Swimmy to have his first b.m. (called meconium) in utero, which can infect the amniotic fluid and just generally be really bad news.

7. Nipple stimulation. This is weird. I’m not doing it.

I have a doctor appointment in the morning. I’m going to ask him to sweep my membranes (which basically involves seperating the waters from the uterine wall) – another way to naturally induce labor. I’m also going to ask him to schedule an induction (please keep your opinions to yourself, thank you- I’m not really inclined to listen to you if you’re not my doctor) for next week if Swimmy doesn’t make an appearance before then.

Sorry to sound like a jerk on the opinion front. You wouldn’t believe how many times in the past week someone has tried to offer “helpful advice.” It’s annoying to hear about how everything you think is incorrect- especially when you’re fat, uncomfortable, hot, and irritable.

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